I am alive, more or less, though I feel very dead.  I am physically exhausted from the workload of being out here. 18 hour days are not very friendly to the human body. I am emotionally exhausted from dealing with everybody's drama and problems, stacked up on top of my own set of problems.  I am spiritually exhausted.  I never thought that I would need the Savior as much as I do now.

I feel lost.  Lot's of things have happened and I have seen things I wish I had never seen.  I can't discuss them with you but it's been a mixed experience.

What has happened to my beloved?  I haven't the slightest idea because I haven't received a letter from her in 7 weeks!  What is the deal with that?!  I miss her and I still find time to write!  WHERE ARE MY LETTERS?!  Geez!

I love her... I just wish she would hurry up and write me.  My morale is suffering from the lack of girlfriend attention.  Yeap... and Christmas is gonna suck.

So for all of you who are back home sleeping comfortably in your beds, just remember the thousands of people like me, who are enduring hardship and pain so that you can read the paper in the morning.

I love you, Kara.  Thank you, Jo, for writing me and sending pics!  Emily, stop being a brat and call up your sister, Julia.  Julia... Kidnap Emily and tell her Big Brother Pat says that you need to talk some sense in to her.  Love you, Teddy Bear.

~Patrick Andrew

Someone once told me that a hero is an ordinary person, in an unordinary situation who does extraordinary things.  I've done my best to be the best man I could be and never let anyone down but it seems that lately, I have been letting everyone down.

I'm not living at my own house anymore.  My father effectively asked me to leave and come back when I became a devout Catholic.  (THAT isn't happening anytime soon).  Yeah, I'll admit that I've made mistakes and I have sinned but I recognize that and I'm working on it.  But throwing me out of the house because I have done some things a while ago (and that I haven't done in the house or his presence) is a dumb reason for kicking some one out.  So screw you, dad.  You're a stupid asshole who, despite leaving that cult, has managed to bring CLC rifling back into my life with your quarantine policy on sin.

And to my CLC buddies out there... it's nothing against you.  But your church creeps me out something fierce.  You'd be creeped out too if you hadn't lived in the church your entire life.  GRRRRR.

Got a new laptop.  I feel special.  It rocks.  It's sooo cool but the battery life sucks... duh!  They always do.  WOO HOO!  I love bonuses.

~Patrick Andrew